Postpartum Relationship Struggles Are More Common Than You Think — And There’s Help Available in Ontario

A new mom I had just met, walking home bleary-eyed from a local baby drop-in group in Toronto, confessed to me that she had threatened her husband with divorce the night before while crouching in their closet clutching their baby.

“I actually told him that I was going to call his cousin, a prominent divorce attorney, so that I could get to her before he could,” she said to me, laughing at her own unhinged behaviour.

I was so grateful for her honesty. There are so many unrealistic expectations about what motherhood should look like, and a blissful, love-filled experience with your partner is often one of them. But the truth is, many new parents struggle in their relationship after having a baby. Moms who are real about these postpartum relationship challenges are my kind of moms.

In fact, most couples experience a drop in relationship satisfaction in the first year postpartum — and for many, that continues into the early parenting years. The combination of sleep deprivation, increased demands on your time, less space for self-care, role changes, financial pressure, and a frequent decline in intimacy is a perfect recipe for feeling misunderstood, disconnected, and resentful.

You’re Not Alone — And Relationship Support for New Parents Is Available

The good news? If you’re struggling, you are not alone, and there is effective therapy that can help you reconnect and rebuild. As a couples therapist in Ontario who specializes in supporting new and expecting parents, I often find that these couples need just a few targeted sessions to start feeling better. They just need someone to help them slow down, communicate effectively, and rebuild their sense of connection. With support, postpartum couples in Ontario can recover from conflict and even grow stronger.

Looking for Couples Therapy After Having a Baby?

If you’ve found yourself in a “hiding-in-the-closet” kind of moment, know that relationship therapy for new moms and dads exists — and you don’t need to wait until things fall apart to get help. Whether you're based in Toronto, Ottawa, Hamilton, or another part of the province, we are a team of Ontario-based therapists who understand the unique stress of new parenthood and can help.

Working with someone who specializes in perinatal mental health and relationship therapy can help you feel seen, heard, and supported — both as individuals and as a couple.

Share this article with another parent who needs the reminder: You’re not alone, and things can get better.